Roots and Wings

A few years ago I was talking with someone about all my travels and how I’d given up my apartment along with most of my stuff and we just seeing where the wind would blow me next. In this conversation he said that as individuals we either have roots or we have wings, but not both. And that he having been in the same place, same job, same everything for many many years clearly had roots and I had found the wings.

At the time I thought yeah, you have roots or you have wings and I was thoroughly enjoying the freedom that came with not having anything specific to tie me down to one place. It was a joy to have no sense of roots because roots to me meant stuck and unable to move. However, over the last year, and especially the last few months, I’ve come to reconsider this statement. How true is it really that I, or anyone, must have one or the other? Why can I not have both roots and wings? I’ve also been reflecting on what each means to me and what does a both/and life of roots and wings really look like.

At the start of this year I knew that I wanted to settle back into somewhere, create my own ‘home’ to have something that was mine each time I walked in the door, and surround myself with community and friends again. This to me was the starting point for roots back in one place again. I was longing for the contentment that comes from having a space of my own and knowing where I’d always head back to. Yet, I also had travel plans and even when I tried not to have them the itch to explore and experience new things came back really quickly. I found I was living the paradox of roots and wings with the desire to have a strong sense of belonging and home yet also the freedom and excitement of exploration.

In April I committed to going back to San Francisco, getting a new apartment, buying furniture and all that fun stuff, and seeing where the journey would take me. I was thrilled to be back in the city I truly love and surround myself with many of my dearest friends. If this isn’t establishing and creating space for roots then I don’t know what is. The connection, community, and belonging that I found myself craving a year ago is right here and continuing to grow. That for me is what roots are all about. Yes, having a physical space is one thing and I do love my apartment and its amazing views, but it’s even more so about the connection and belonging that I feel being in proximity to my community rather than constantly bouncing around the globe.

On the flipside I’m also looking to find the right balance and what exactly it is that enables the wings to stretch. Travel is always going to be a part of that, I’ve come to see that as a known fact. There’s travel to explore and experience new places but also travel to old places to reconnect with friends who are there and bring a sense of home to what might seem like a far off place. I find these equally satisfying and needed.

But what else gives me that feeling of stretched and challenged wings that may not need to be spending hours on planes and in foreign lands? This is a lot of what I spend my time thinking about now and San Francisco is a great place to do it. I had my existing friends and network when I returned but the challenge to myself was to expand and create new connections and friendships to see where they may lead. Having spent the last few years living and creating experiences for myself I’m looking to do that for others so that I can keep and strengthen my wings but also maybe help others find them.

Community, connection, and a strong sense of belonging have become the balance to my pervasive desire in the last few years for freedom and exploration. I certainly haven’t gotten them perfectly balanced yet and not sure they ever will be but knowing what pieces I need in the equation has been step one. And, I know for sure it doesn’t have to be a choice of roots or wings. There are enormous benefits that come from feelings of each and certain times may call for one more than the other. But, the best part is that in the world and life I’m creating I get to have both.

I know with my soul that it is indeed possible to thrive having both deeply connected roots and powerfully outstretched wings. I look forward to many adventures ahead that continue to strengthen and develop roots along with the freedom and fulfillment the wings enable.

xoxo

jessie